This is a long one haha hope you can read it.
Original Draft TreatmentWe begin in a living room an overly tidy living room, nothing is out of place, the room is very cold, not quite lived in yet, very sparse.There’s no pictures, or paintings to show that of family, just a cold room with a few material belongings. The telephone begins to ring, and again, and again. In walks a young woman no more than 22, her hair is dark and tied back, her face is pretty, she is wearing minimal makeup but still ever so precise. She reaches for the telephone, she takes a deep breath and answers “hello” she pauses “right” again another pause “ok, I’ll be ready … goodbye” with not a single expression. She places down the receiver in a slow vacant motion, she looks disheartened and sighs “huhh”, her shoulders slouch a little but still she keeps her strong posture.
She walks into the hallway as if she wasn’t walking at all but floating, she then turns and remembers to turn off the lights, it goes dark. ‘Bang, bang, bang’. There is forceful repeated knocking on the door it stops then comes back much more forceful, ‘Bang, bang, bang’, Angelina comes rushing down the stairs in her night clothes and dressing gown still looking immaculate and speedily rushes to open the front door.
All of a sudden as she opens the door she has a flashback. A middle aged woman is looking with pure disgust down at something or someone.
An old woman is stood in front of the door with her hand raised ready to begin knocking on the door, she is old with curly grey hair and a head scarf tightly around her hair so the wind won’t put it out of place, she is wearing a grey raincoat and a scarf around her neck. She looks at Angelina with utter disgust “Well Angelina, are you going to ask me to come in, or am I to stand here while you look at me so rudely?” She barges past Angelina speedily and firmly into the house. Angelina looks so vulnerable and exhausted.
Angelina goes up to her bedroom to make herself look more respectable, while the old woman is waiting impatiently downstairs. Angelina walks into the kitchen well dressed with not a thing out of place, the old woman is sat rigidly with her legs crossed and her hands tightly holding her bag as if it was something of importance, she sighs about the length of time she has had to wait alone. Angelina walks towards the kettle and begins to make one cup of tea she looks out of the window into a daydream, while stirring the cup of tea vigorously. She walks over and hands the old woman the cup of tea, the old woman takes a sip of tea.
Angelina goes into another flashback. Tea erupts from a middle-aged woman’s mouth and a look of pure disgust rises upon her face as she looks down towards something or someone, “you think I would drink that you disgusting girl, do you think this is good enough for me, you’re never going to amount to anything, you can’t even perform a simple task like making a cup of tea”, she looks down and walks out of the room.
The old woman swallows her sip of tea, and looks at Angelina like she wasn’t even in the room says “you have got better”. Angelina looks down disappointed as though she has nothing left in her to say, even the old woman said it as compliment. The old woman takes out a cluster of paperwork from her bag and slides them along the work top to Angelina. “I mean” she sighs “how do they think we are suppose to choose, it’s not something we really want to discuss is it? Well none of these are suitable not to my standards anyway.”
Angelina has another flashback, the middle-aged woman is stood shaking her head and tapping her foot in frustration and fury, she seems to be looking at some child’s drawings. The drawings have pictures of a happy daughter and father in fields and houses, they look so happy together. A look of anger grows across the woman’s face.
“This will not do, this will just not do young lady, how can you even begin to imagine winning the schools competition with this standard of drawings, I am disappointed Angelina, very disappointed. And why Angelina why? I don’t even need to ask, is that you’re father on here?” she says as she taps her finger on the picture. “Do you think being daddy’s little girl will work for you all your life, he needs to wake up and realise you’re not the little angel he believes, and you’re just a little girl with nothing nice about her at all, you will never make me happy nor will you ever amount to anything Angelina.” She rips up the drawings into shreds with anger, and leaves the room.
Angelina has a dazed look on her face, as she listens to the woman babbling, her face begins to focus and she listens to what she is saying.
“So I think the only one that will do is this one yes?” Angelina nods phased by what she is saying
“I think I will say a few words and you can if you want” she looks at Angelina knowingly that she isn’t paying attention. She tries to catch her eye. “Angelina, Angelina are you listening to me? Angie!” Angelina startled looks up at her for what she has just called her. “Ah right Angelina, we need to discuss this I know it’s not pleasant but it won’t wait I really need you to help me with this I need you Angie!” A sudden burst of anger and frustration come across Angelina’s face, she snaps “YOU, YOU MOTHER, YOU NEED ME? An independent woman like you mother. Where were you?” Angelina’s face closes in on her mother, she becomes face to face with her, she gets her breath and steps away, she walks towards the sink and heavily blows out her rage. “Where were you when I needed a mother, not a cold hard bitch that thought I could never amount to anything, and was never satisfied with me for who I am.” She looks as though she is about to cry, but still manages to keep her composure, she knows it is essential for what she is about to do. She looks out of the window and looks as if remembering a small smile comes across her face. “you hated that dad loved me, that he wanted to spend time with me, do you know my best memories are christmas’ with grandma and grandpops in America, when you weren’t there. I was just a little girl all I wanted was for you to love me, but all you did was bully me mother.” she stands tall and looks out of the window, she turns towards her mother.
“so I’m sorry if I don’t want to talk about which one I think he would want or which one would be best for him, because frankly I think he’s up there thanking God he’s no longer down here with you. But I am, and I can’t do it anymore, after dad’s funeral you won’t see me again, I have waited years to free myself from you and now I have. Please leave my house and my life Marianne.”
Her mother looks up at Angelina as though, she has had her world turned upside down, she looks just like Angelina did as a child disappointed in herself, she looks up at her last hope.“ But Angelina I need you now!” she smiles politely. Angelina does not move or even look up at her mother “Marianne leave my house.” Marianne slowly stands up, all of her strength has vanished and she is now just a bitter frail old woman who has nothing to offer anybody. She grabs her bag and the paperwork and walks out of the kitchen.
Angelina walks out behind her, Marianne opens the front door and takes a last look behind her as she looks for hope of her changing her mind, Angelina shows no remorse. Marianne walks out the door. Angelina takes a deep breath and composes herself she sighs, as her face begins to crack and a small smile comes across her face, a smile of relief.
